“Love you for you”.
“Embrace aaaaall your lady lumps and bumps”.
“Your body is perfect the way god made it”.
That’s because it is.
What if you were never in love with yourself in the first place?!
What if you can barely look in the mirror… Let alone ‘love’ what you see staring back at you?
What if you want to change yourself and your body? Do you just pretend to like what you see in the meantime?
They ^^ are all very natural questions.
And anyone that tells you otherwise is lying to you (and themselves).
Is loving yourself and your body an impossible dream?
But it’s a darn short sighted way of thinking and isn’t doing you any favours in the long term.
Nor right this second to be entirely honest… So keep reading 😛
Now sit back, relax and let me explain the 3 reasons why ‘self love’ as we know it is entirely flawed so that you can be on your way to achieving the real deal asap…
1. Realise it’s ok NOT to love yourself and your body entirely.
Half of the battle stems from thinking that we ‘should’ love ourselves, our body and all that we stand for.
Just like Rome wasn’t built in a day and Drake didn’t go from 0-100 real quick…
How on earth can you expect to go from a place of self-hate to a place of instantaneous, fantastical and all encompassing self-love?!
What you need to pay attention to here is CONTEXT – campaigns of self-love (social media, magazines etc) are aimed at those who well… Are further from any realm of self-love than a desert camel is from spring water.
2. Start with self-appreciation.
How about we take those first little (boring, unsexy but oh so effective and steady) steps into appreciating, respecting and honouring ourselves and our body?
We’re not asking to love ourselves yesterday.
We’re simply saying…
“I accept myself, respect my body for what it can do, admire that it can bring new life into this world and refuse to beat it down by comparing it to society’s ideals.”
A little golden nugget for you: ‘Body appreciation’ is actually a fully recognised positive psychology concept and is closely interlinked with intuitive eating and exercise that isn’t driven by appearance.
3. Think of it as ‘continued self-development.’
Now this is where the plot thickens and may sound like I’m contradicting myself but stay with me…
Yes, self-acceptance and body appreciation come first.
But once that ^^ is solidly in place…
There is absolutely no reason to refrain from bettering ourselves or becoming happy-er by making appearance related changes.
The key here is INTENT – ask yourself the reason why you want to make these changes.
If your reason is out of hate over respect and beating down over improved health…
Then it’s the wrong reason and you need to go back to my previous point 🙂